Happier parents tap into this 1 emotion

It’s one thing to humble brag by posting a slew of photos of your cute kid to social media. But what’s the emotion behind those actions? If it’s pure pride and awe that you’re feeling, then you’re likely in a pretty good parenting place.

At least that’s the theory behind new research out of Rochester University, published this week in the journal Social Psychology and Personality Science after a team conducted a series of studies involving nearly 900 parents to look at how parental pride and awe affect aspects of well-being.

“Parental pride and awe are common and beneficial feelings parents can have with their children,” said the lead author, graduate student Princeton Chee, in a news release. “Parents may feel proud when their child does something they worked hard to succeed in and accomplish. They may feel awe when their child does something amazing or completely unexpected that make them feel like saying ‘woah’ or ‘wow.'” 

While both pride and awe proved beneficial, the feeling of awe appeared to have more profound effects on overall well-being. “We find that awe can actually strengthen parental well-being more broadly and holistically, compared to pride, making parents lives feel happier, more meaningful, and richer in experiences,” Chee noted. 

Awe, the study found, connects parents to something larger than themselves, including the concept of parenthood itself, while pride is more about ego and accomplishments.

For example, the study found, although pride experiences most frequently centered on a child’s talent, experiencing awe was equally dispersed across talent, love/kindness, growth, and special
moments.

It’s likely why awe showed stronger associations with purpose and meaning for parents.

“Awe in particular can help parents fully immerse themselves by making time feel like it’s slowing down during extraordinary moments,” said Chee. 

The researchers wanted to find ways for parenthood to be rewarding, particularly in the wake of the U.S. surgeon general, Vivek Murthy, calling parental stress a public health issue just last year.

“Our research finds that one way in which parenthood can be rewarding, rather than detrimental,” said Chee, “is through feeling pride and especially awe with one’s child.” 

Awe, the researchers point out, needn’t be reserved for major moments. “It doesn’t have to be only once in a lifetime, extraordinary experiences in which parents feel awe,” says Chee, but can be felt “through things as simple as weekend outings and quality time spent with one’s child.”